IVF: InVincible Focus

I mean, i don’t get off on injecting myself, but at least each evening i can feel like i am pushing on through another day, another moment closer through this torturous journey – perhaps on my way to our miracle.  I am certainly not a fan of my latest addition to my evening stomach spearing… Continue reading IVF: InVincible Focus

The future is bright

I was wearing simple loose “boyfriend” jeans, rolled up at the ends, some kind of flat trainers and a plain navy blue jumper.  Our kitchen had old wooden flooring and my laptop was perched on the same kitchen table we have now, where I was working on something related to maternity Mindfulness for “Baby I Am… Continue reading The future is bright

No to pregnancy, Yes to IVF

With my thyroid levels now in the right zone and with the security of IVF finally scheduled for the next cycle after a 6 month delay (given the emergency surgery and third pregnancy loss, healing time, admin, an unknown number of blood tests and then a Hashimotos diagnosis), I really did hope I could be… Continue reading No to pregnancy, Yes to IVF

Failing in friendships: fertility vs friends

Dear friends, I probably owe you an explanation. I know I’ve been absent these last few years, and I don’t intend on always being in hiding, so I hope that door is still going to be open in the future. Some of you have tried to reach out, to offer to meet, have a coffee,… Continue reading Failing in friendships: fertility vs friends

Gaining through the loss

Maybe the best way to actually consolidate this is to bullet point it.  The message is clear.  The loss which lies at the core of my broken heart and soul, the loss that fills every day with emptiness, the loss that makes me feel inadequate, the loss that makes me lost, the loss that forever… Continue reading Gaining through the loss

Stream of bloody consciousness

I could probably set my blog posts up to be on rotation, because these emotions are cyclical and predictable based on yet another failed attempt to conceive naturally this cycle. The last few weeks have been immensely frustrating.  I’ve spent time working towards psychologically preparing myself for IVF but this is now going to take… Continue reading Stream of bloody consciousness

What part of insensitive can you not understand?

Honestly, it baffles me.  The days when my place of work served as a needed escape from my own baby related issues are long gone.  Of course the topic is always going to surface in some way, but seriously, I am astounded.  You are an intelligent group of people – you represent elite universities including… Continue reading What part of insensitive can you not understand?